Managing Expectations

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It’s crucial to consider expectations before saying “yes” to something.

Everything we commit to comes with a list of expectations, and honestly, I struggle with this. So, I am challenging myself to ask two questions:

– How will this “yes” feel two weeks, two months or six months from now?
– Could any part of this “yes” be tied to people pleasing and allowing that desire to skew my judgment of what’s realistic?

Realistic expectations should be planned for. That means I have to make myself write down the demands for this yes answer on my calendar. If it’s a project, then I make a project timeline. If it’s a financial commitment, I make out a budget.

When I can plan for what’s realistic, I won’t overextend myself. Evaluation eliminates frustration!

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Related Resources:

The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

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People Pleasing

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My name is Lysa and I want people to like me.

No matter how I spin it, I have to call it what it is: PEOPLE PLEASING. It’s part of my DNA to want to please other people and not disappoint them.

I have to realize God calls me to love people, not please them.  Real love is honest. Real love cares enough about other people to say “no” when saying “yes” would build up a barrier in the relationship. Real love pursues authenticity rather than chasing acceptance.

My tendency is to just stuff and smile, and that is not honest.

There are some people I won’t please no matter how many times I say “yes,” and some people won’t stop liking me no matter how many times I say “no.”

That second group … those are my true friends, and I love them for that!

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The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

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Overwhelmed Schedule = Underwhelmed Soul

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I know what it’s like to live with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule and ache with the sadness of an underwhelmed soul.

Someone makes an unrealistic request of me; my brain and my schedule say no, but my heart says yes! Then my mouth betrays my intention of saying no, as it smiles and says, “Yes, of course.”

So I get all twisted up in deciding to say yes or no, not realizing there is a third option: my Best Yes.

A Best Yes is you playing your part in God’s plan. If you know it and believe it, you’ll live it. You’ll live your life making decisions with the Best Yes as your best filter.

Then, you’ll be able to underwhelm your schedule so God can overwhelm your soul!

For more daily encouragement download our FREE app First 5, and spend your first moments of each day with God.

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The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

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The Two Most Powerful Words

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The two most powerful words are yes and no.

How I use the words yes and no determine how I set my schedule. How I set my schedule determines how I live my life. How I live my life determines how I spend my soul.

When I think about my decisions in light of spending my soul, it gives gravity to choosing wisely. Each and every thing I say yes to sets the pace of my life.

I must remember when a woman lives with the stress of an overwhelmed schedule, she’ll ache with the sadness of an underwhelmed soul, a soul full of life but no time to enjoy any of it.

For more daily encouragement download our FREE app First 5, and spend your first moments of each day with God.

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The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

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Mom Guilt

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Three days in a row I started the clothes in the washer but forgot to move them to the dryer.

Do you ever have days like that, where you feel like you are just spinning your wheels? Can I share a tip I’ve been practicing? Rather than beat myself up for three laundry failures, I choose to focus on all the things I did successfully.

  • Fed my people? Check.
  • Got them to and from school? Check.
  • Hang with the hubs and have quality time with him? Check.
  • And about 67 other things.

I have plenty of days where everything doesn’t get done. But on those days, there is usually a pretty long list of things that DID get done, so I choose to celebrate those. Because Mom-guilt just sabotages future success, and nobody’s got time for that. Right Mamas?

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Related Resources:

NIV Real-Life Devotional Bible for Women

Covenant Experience Guide

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Recharging our Batteries

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My son left our iPad in the car all weekend. When he realized his mistake, the iPad was completely dead.

Cooper needed to use the iPad right away. So he plugged it in and tried to boot it up. Nothing happened. I told him he’d have to give it time to recharge.

What a picture of my life. I go and go, getting completely run down until I shut down.

You and I aren’t wired to run indefinitely. This is why God’s command for us to have Sabbath rest isn’t archaic or unnecessary. It’s as current as the latest mobile device on the market.

No matter what day you choose to shut down and recharge, Sabbath rest means that we take the necessary time to refuel our batteries by resting and refocusing on God so that we can run at full strength.

For more daily encouragement download our FREE app First 5, and spend your first moments of each day with God.

Related Resources:

NIV Real-Life Devotional Bible for Women

The Books of 1 & 2 Samuel Experience Guide

Check out all of Proverbs 31 Ministries Resources

Living Life Backwards

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Sometimes I slip into living life backwards.

I let my to-do list overflow while withholding my time with the Lord. When what I need to do is let my time with the Lord overflow while withholding my to-do list.

It’s a mistake I think a lot of us women make. We’re slaves to the tyranny of the urgent. But how can we continue to pour out if we aren’t being filled back up on a daily basis?

The flood of demands will consume us if we don’t take the time to let God right our perspective, reduce our stress level, and whisper His tender truths of love in our ear.

Let’s decide in our hearts today that we’ll slow down enough this week to receive all that He longs to pour into us each and every day.

For encouragement to start your day, download our FREE app First 5, and spend your first moments of each day with God.

Related Resources:

The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

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Honest Questions

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When I can feel an argument brewing, I have to remember my goal is to tackle the issue not the person.

When I approach a conflict by attacking the person, I throw out condemning, hurtful statements, but when I tackle an issue, I ask questions. For instance, “Can you help me understand why you feel this way?” or “What can I do to make this situation better?”

By seeking to understand their perspective, I shift from trying to prove I am right to trying to improve the relationship

When I set out to prove I’m right, it always leads to conflict escalation. When I set out to improve the relationship, it leads to conflict resolution.

It isn’t always easy, but it is so much better to throw out a gentle question rather than a bitter, condemning statement.

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Becoming More Than A Good Bible Study Girl by Lysa TerKeurst

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Staying on Track

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When friends ask how I’ve managed to eat healthy for the past few years, I say it’s one good choice after another!

It’s not easy, but I have to think about the realities of the food choices I make every day. If I were struggling with finances, I would need to think about the price before I decide to buy something. The same is true with my food choices. I can’t eat, eat, eat and just pretend the calories won’t add up. I need to remember that I have the power to make sure the next thing I put in my mouth is healthy.

We were meant to consume food, but food was never meant to consume us. We can ask God to help us make the right food choices, to know when enough is enough, and to listen to that still, small voice inside that says, “stop.”

With God’s help, we can make one wise choice after another!

For more daily encouragement download our FREE app First 5, and spend your first moments of each day with God.

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Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst

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People Pleasing

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I really struggle with being a people pleaser.

We all want to be liked, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But if I’m seeking to please the Lord first and foremost, I will ask two questions before agreeing to do something for another person:

First, am I doing this with good motives?

And second, am I doing this for selfish reasons to gain acceptance?

You know, wherever we focus our attention the most, that will become the driving force in our lives.

The more I focus on trying to figure out how to please people, the more of a magnified force people-pleasing will become in my life.

But the more I focus on trying to figure out how to please God, the more of a magnified force He will become in my life. My focus. My choice.

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Uninvited by Lysa Terkeurst

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