“See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God. Beloved, we are God's children now.” 1 John 3:1a, 2a (ESV)
Unwanted. Unlikable. Undesirable.
The words tumbled in my mind. My phone sat silent beside me. I ached for a text from my friend who I hadn’t heard from in weeks. She’d canceled our weekly coffee dates, and when I reached out, her replies were one-word answers. I missed her encouragement, laughter and the bits of life we did together.
Replaying the last few weeks over in my mind, I had no idea what happened. She was under a lot of stress as she prepared for her child to leave for college, dealt with elderly parents and managed the little ones still at home. Maybe she just needed space.
As the weeks turned into months, the excuses I’d made for her fell away, and I concluded it had to be me. My friend distanced herself, and for me, that meant she must not like me. I felt rejected, discouraged and alone.
One morning I opened my Bible and read today’s key verse: “See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God. Beloved, we are God's children now” (1 John 3:1a, 2a).
Beloved. Valued. Belonging. Accepted. Wanted.
Regardless of what others say or do, our identity rests secure in who God says we are. He says we are beloved. He says we are cherished for who we are in His eyes, not because of something we’ve done or not done. We are precious in His sight, one-of-a-kind, created for a unique purpose.
Our identity is formed by what we believe about ourselves. I felt rejected and worthless because of the conversation playing in my head. I based my identity on what I assumed my friend felt about me. Essentially, I believed this formula: Because X happened, I assumed Y must be true.
By changing Who defines my value, I rewrite the way I view the situation.
Instead of saying, “My friend pulled away so she must not like me,” I can say, “My friend has distanced herself from me. I don’t know why, but I am a beloved child of God.” When my identity isn’t tied to what my friend thinks of me, I feel secure in Christ and can pray for her or reach out to encourage her.
It was uncomfortable, but with my identity in Christ, I reached out to my friend. Turns out it was a combination of a misunderstanding and a busy season of her life. It’s a reminder to me there’s wisdom in assuming the best about others, realizing it’s not always about me and extending grace as much as possible.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for Your unconditional love for me. I pray You would help me to remember my identity lies in You and not in other people or circumstances. Thank You that no matter what is going on around me, I can rest in Your loving arms. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
TRUTH FOR TODAY
1 Peter 2:9, “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” (NIV)
Luke 15:8-10, “Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Won’t she light a lamp and sweep the entire house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she will call in her friends and neighbors and say, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, there is joy in the presence of God’s angels when even one sinner repents.” (NLT)
Ephesians 1:5, “God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.” (NLT)
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REFLECT AND RESPOND
What conversation are you having with yourself today? Hold your thoughts up to the light of the Word of God and evaluate them based on who God says you are. Your value comes not from who you are, but Whose you are. What is most true about you?
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