What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do

by Nicki Koziarz March 12, 2024
“But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.” James 3:17 (ESV)

A few months ago, after five persistent years, our family welcomed three boys through international adoption.

The wait was hard, brutal at times, and filled with complications that caused multiple delays. It seemed so unfair to everyone involved, especially the boys.

One of our boys has a significant medical issue, and the older he grew, the more complicated the healing process would be. Each year that passed, we held that reality.

Adopting older children can be challenging, so we prepared our minds with books, videos, podcasts and therapy. We did the work.

We prepared our home, finances and lives to add three more children to the mix. We did everything we could to get ready.

But sometimes, no matter how much you prepare for something, you cannot prepare for what the thing will actually be like. Which is why, after a long, sleepless week of navigating a surgery and complicated recovery process with our son, I found myself on the bathroom floor, crying and asking, “What do I do now?”

Nothing was like we thought it would be.
Things were way more complicated than we were prepared for.
I was getting to the point where I felt like I was in way over my head.

Maybe you’ve been there too. The email that leaves you wordless, the text update you couldn’t have imagined, or the phone call that leaves your emotions tangled in a knot. Sometimes when we’re asking the question, What do I do now? we need something tangible to hold on to.

That day, I recalled James 3:17. And I knew I had a choice: Have a pity party or declare the power of God’s wisdom. I choose the latter.

I began making biblical declarations over my situation, and instead of asking God why, I shifted to, What does this mean? I proclaimed James 3:17 over this situation, and within a few hours, I had some clarity on what our next steps could be.

But more than anything, my soul had peace. This is the promise James 3:17 offers us when we choose to seek wisdom from above:

“But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.”

In this season, I’m learning to rely on the wisdom of God. He is the only One who sees the entire picture. He knows the things I don’t. He understands things doctors cannot.

Yes, sometimes I find myself teetering to a place where the bathroom floor beckons me back. I am human, and so are you. No one expects you to walk through hard times in perfection.

But choose to stay in the process of seeking godly wisdom, and somehow, with the power of God, you’ll know what to do when you don’t know what to do.

God, thank You that when we don’t know what to do, You’re always there to guide us toward peace. Give us discernment and wisdom for the things we need today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


Today, Nicki Koziarz is releasing a new devotional book titled Wiser: 40 Decisions to Grow Daily in God’s Wisdom. This devotional book will help you seek God’s wisdom for 40 days. Click here to purchase it through Proverbs 31 Ministries to support our ministry as we share God’s wisdom with you daily!

That habit you haven’t been able to kick yet? That thought pattern you keep ruminating on? That situation you’re struggling to trust God with? You may feel hopeless that these things can ever get better or even be convinced you’ll always be trapped in this place. But, friend, we’re here to remind you that with God’s help, change is not just possible but probable! That’s why we created this free download, “Why Can’t I Get Over This? 5 Steps To Get Unstuck in the Areas You Can’t Seem To Make Progress In.” This resource will help you identify what’s currently not working and why, by answering intentional questions that will get you excited about the future again. Click here to get started today!





Join Nicki over on Instagram @NickiKoziarz today as she shares 10 biblical declarations to speak over your life.


Psalm 55:22, “Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved” (ESV).

Psalm 37:5, “Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act” (ESV).

Why do you think it can be hard to seek God’s wisdom?

What is an example of a time you sought and found God’s wisdom? Share your experience in the comments today, and encourage someone else with your story!

© 2024 by Nicki Koziarz. All rights reserved.

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