When God Hasn't Given You the Desires of Your Heart

by Grace Valentine April 14, 2023
“Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4 (NIV)

God has blessed me with so many good things. A safe place to live, food to eat, people to love and serve … yet if I’m being really honest with you, I always seem to desire more.

I want a relationship with a good man who enjoys sushi as much as me, and I want a pretty house, maybe even one with a pool in the suburbs. I would love two goldendoodles who hopefully don’t have any expensive vet bills … Also, I desire more brunch plans with fun friends, a way to stay healthy while eating fast food every day, and a career I love that pays the bills.

Is that too much to ask for?

The other day, I thought about all the things I desired that weren’t happening, and out of my frustration, I felt a sarcastic laugh bubble up. Ha ha, God, You said You would give me the desires of my heart. But nope, I’m not seeing them. So much for that.

I was frustrated because I thought if I was holding the pen writing my story, my life would be different. I thought if I was “good” … good would come my way.

But here I am. I still juggle a couple jobs while I write on the side. My mornings are early, and my small house has an old, white fridge that could die any day. I sometimes feel left out by my friends, but I know it’s probably more my insecurity than their actions. I struggle with my body image and friendships at times, and I am single.

So in response to my frustration that I didn't have more of my desires, I went back and read the Bible passage where I thought God promised to give me the desires of my heart.

Read it with me, friends:

“Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun” (Psalm 37:3-6, NIV).

If you also feel like you want more in your life and feel a little disappointed that God hasn't given you some of your wants ... then let's break down these verses together. I noticed when rereading this passage that God calls us to trust, delight and commit. Understanding this changed my perspective and gave me peace in the midst of a season of wanting more.

  1. Trust in the LORD and do good … ” (Psalm 37:3, NIV, emphasis added)

Notice this verse doesn’t say, “Trust in your plans and do good.” We are called to trust in the Lord and let God be sovereign over it all. Even when we don't understand the chapter, we must trust that the Author of our story is good. We should also do good, but not as an exchange for good to come our way. We do good because God is good to us. While we wait on blessings, instead of sitting around wishing for more, we should be a blessing to others.

  1. "Take delight in the LORD …” (Psalm 37:4, emphasis added)

Before the verse even mentions the Lord giving us the desires of our hearts, it reminds us to take delight in the Lord. When we delight in God, we care more about what makes His Kingdom grow than what makes our happiness grow, and celebrating Him helps us remember our lives were never meant to be all about ourselves. When we delight in the Lord, we realize we don’t need expensive things, a picture-perfect life, or the fulfillment of all our dreams to find joy. We can find His presence and His joy in big moments, sure … but also in the little moments. Getting coffee with a friend, watching our child get excited when they pass a hard test, enjoying a sunny day in the midst of winter. When we delight in God, our desires become less about us and more about His will and peace.

  1. Commit your way to the LORD … ” (Psalm 37:5, NIV, emphasis added)

When we commit to doing life with God, we have a real relationship with Him. Just like when a husband and wife commit and share vows, our commitment to Christ means our lives are no longer our own. We now have a purpose and meaning that's not about being the main character and life going our way. We trust God because He loves us. As a result, even in the midst of a busy Thursday, while running errands, or during back-to-back meetings, His joy shines bright like the morning sun. He gives us peace in the chaos and unexpected hardships.

So today, it is my prayer that you and I will desire more of Jesus and less from the world. With Jesus, when we trust, delight and commit to the Lord, we can find peace in His plan and be OK even when life isn't going how we dreamt it would.

Lord, help me to trust You, delight in You, and commit to focusing more on You and less on my worldly desires. Remind me that when I grow in a relationship with You, I may still want some things, but my ultimate desire will always be for Your will and for Your glory. When I'm struggling with contentment, remind me You are good at being God, and You are working for my good. In Jesus' Name, Amen.


If you’re looking for wisdom when you don’t know what to do, you don’t have to wonder what God would say or think because He has already given us the answers in His Word. We have access to a real God, who has given us real solutions to our real-life struggles. Learn more with our next study, 1 & 2 Corinthians: Wisdom for the Questions You Have and Hope for the Discouragements You Feel, starting April 17 in the free First 5 mobile app. Click here to order your study guide!



Did you relate to this devotion today? Grace Valentine, the author of this devotion, has a new devotional book for young women that came out this week: To the Girl Looking for More: 90 Devotions to Help You Ditch the Lies, Love Yourself, and Live Big for God. This could be the perfect gift for you or a young woman in your life. You can order Grace’s 90-day devotional book here.



For more encouragement from Grace Valentine, follow her on Instagram @thegracevalentine. Her website is


Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (NIV)

How can you remind yourself God is working for your good? If we delight in the Lord, how does this change what “good” looks like in our lives? We'd love to hear from you in the comments!

© 2023 by Grace Valentine. All rights reserved.

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